Dear Dog,

Retreat Day Four: a letter to my horse.

Dear Dog,

Oh sweet boy. I loved meeting you.

When I first met you, I noticed your little underbite and your big olè lip! It stuck out further than your upper lip like a little baby pouting.

You sniffed me and accepted the little kiss on your head, just like Cesar lets me do.

On the drive out here, I knew I was going to fall in love with whatever horse I got paired with and Dog, it felt like love at first sight with you. Every time I get on your back, you yawn, releasing all of the anxiousness I’m bombarding you with.

And then, a big exhale like you’re telling me, “We’ve got this.”

Our gallop on day one was exhilarating. It was my first time ever galloping - ever, did you know that?

Day two gallop with you through the dunes will be a memory I carry forever. I’m not just telling you this to butter you up, Dog. I mean it, it felt like a bucket list item you helped me achieve.

And day three, this ride today, I felt it. Dog, I tear up writing this because it hit me out on the trail, how safe I felt with you. I closed my eyes several times on your back and just let you take me while I breathed - I know you felt it.

Dog, as I tightened the reins, I felt your excitement to just takeoff. I told you once, I think you were a racehorse in another life, your ability to just get up and go is pretty impressive.

As we flew through the pastures together, kicking up sand behind us, I could feel your check ins with me, knowing how much I could handle - not how much I thought I could handle.

You helped me push my boundaries, you made me drop walls, you forced me past the imaginary limits I thought I had set and showed me what I was capable of.

Dog, when we lined up in the sand creek to race, my nerves were off the charts. I tightened the reins and whispered “OK, take me…” as I gently kicked your sides and like lightning, we were off! I tucked in as we went into full gallop and you ran like butter.

I laughed, passing every other horse and we took the number one spot. I hugged you when we stopped, thanking you for taking such good care of me.

Dog, thank you. This week you helped me step into a version of myself I’ve felt deep inside for a while. I was never really able to wear her boots until now. I hope you felt my love, the full heart you filled.